Issue #33: Thank God It's Friday and Wanderlust
"Thank you. I'm disengaging. I'm not engaging."
You guys, nothing is going right.
Jesy left Little Mix. Got7 is on indefinite hiatus. And I don’t even want to talk about the Capital-B-Bad things we’ve witnessed and the Capital-T-Tragic losses we’ve endured in the span of *checks watch* one Gregorian month.
It is very much imperative to me that HB/LB is FOR stupid bitches, BY stupid bitches. But what’s a stupid bitch to do in the face of all of this? Lean on a questionable coping mechanism like escapism?
Yeah, okay, sounds fun! Let’s do it!
Escape with me into two fantastic movies characterized by the two most powerful words in the English language:
Ensemble. Comedy.
Okay, full body chills! Let us proceed.
HIGHBROW
Before I tell you anything about this first movie, I wish to submit to the court this still of a 26-year-old Jeff Goldblum with his pre-fame teeth:
This alone is a formidable contribution to cinema. But there’s actually more.
The still is taken from the Thank God It’s Friday, a 1978 film about one sexy and kooky night at a real, bona fide Los Angeles disco. The film stars the aforementioned Jeff Goldblum, looking like the motherfuckin’ prototype, lead singer of Berlin Terri Nunn, acting like she’s me in quarantine (thinks wearing her one cheap wig will fix her life), and Disco Incarnate herself, Donna THEE Summer, playing an undiscovered songstress desperate for stage time.
I can’t tell you how much fun I had just watching people dance and flirt and pack into a giant room full of neon lights, disco balls, and fake palm trees. And not to be all “and nary a mask in sight,” but seeing people party in large groups with no concept of a pandemic makes me… what’s the German word for “horny yet angry yet deeply depressed but in the end I’ll try to mimic the feeling that the film gave me by dancing to some Giorgio Moroder Essentials playlist by myself because that actually does successfully trick my brain into thinking I’m having fun and, ultimately, if you think you’re having fun, aren’t you just having fun?” I think the phrase is “ausreichend amüsiert?”
You can watch Thank God It’s Friday on Prime Video, on whatever the frick Tubi is, or you can watch it on YouTube if you absolutely adore being interrupted every 5 minutes by a Grammarly ad.
LOWBROW
When I say the cast for this next one is a Brick House, babe, it’s because that lady is STACKED. I’m talking, Kathryn Hahn, Paul Rudd, Jennifer Anniston, Jordan Peele, Justin Theroux, Alan Alda, Kathryn Hahn, Michaela Watkins, Ken Marino, Kerri Kenney-Silver, Malin Akerman, Joe Lo Truglio, Kathryn Hahn, Kathryn Hahn, Kathryn Hahn. The movie is Wanderlust and the vibe is straight up Goofy-Mc-Sillytown.
Do you know why I love this movie so much? For us? For right now? It’s because it is straight-up dumb. And we need that, you guys. Because shit is HEAVY. So far, in the 2020s, we don’t really have license to be stupid for the heck of it. Everything has weight. I had to watch Ashton Kutcher cry about racism… you know what I mean? I did not ask for this reality, but it’s what I have to work with.
But Wanderlust? It’s from a simpler time, man. A year called 2012. Talk about carefree! You know what I was doing in 2012? Probably grinding it out to an Ellie Goulding EDM remix in the sticky basement of some frat. Sounds pretty carefree to me. I obviously didn’t care about VERY MUCH.
Now, it is important that you go into this movie knowing one very important thing (not the plot, plot is irrelevant). I find that one of my favorite critical tools to employ when viewing film is the “lens.” It can offer a heightened experience. So, you could just watch Wanderlust. Or you could watch Wanderlust through the lens of knowing that Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux started dating after filming this movie, which means you aren’t just watching Wanderlust, you are also watching Jennifer Aniston fall in real and actual love on screen with this man. Do you understand the power of that? This is borderline cinéma vérité! You can also employ an additional lens of, say, legal cannabis, if that’s your thing.
You can rent Wanderlust a few different places: Prime, YouTube, or if you so happen to have Cinemax? I don’t know, you guys, streaming is a mess.
***
Thank you as always for reading. I hope you have as much fun reading this as I do writing it (minus the crippling performance anxiety roflmao).
AND if you are wanting to express your love language of gift-giving this Valentine’s Day, I’d like to point you to Sorrel and the Sea, a black-owned, woman-owned purveyor of handmade, hand-bound journals. They’ve put together a bundle of their handmade goods for Valentine’s Day that ships all across the US. And for those in the Atlanta area, they are even delivering special flower arrangement bundles. And we all deserve special things, non?
I will see you all in the next issue, whenever that may be. In the meantime, take care of yourselves and your people!
xoxo,
Simone
This is so good!! Thank you for giving us stuff to laugh at! I will be listening to Giorgio Moroder Essentials to be uplifted
Thank you for writing this! These are movies I’ll be watching on my kid free time